Melania

This film is what’s known as a “vanity” piece because it’s funded by the same person who stars in it. In this case, the First Lady of the United States of America, Mrs. Melania Trump. Now I’ll stop right there to steal a line from Melanie McDonah, who opines in The Standard, and I paraphrase, “If you don’t like Donald Trump to the point where seeing some of him is actually a neuralgic thing, this may not be for you.” That is some classic movie reviewing right there and probably better than anything I’m going to come up with.

However, if you’re a political wonk, I’m not sure how you could miss it. A few things about this movie you may already know. It boasts one of the highest acquisitions ever for a documentary. We can thank our Amazon Prime accounts for that. Mr. Jeff Bezos found it expedient to expend 40 million for distribution rights and 35 million for global marketing. He also has a cameo in the movie sitting at the President and Melania’s table during the 2025 inaugural gala dinner. An event that ties together the entire narrative. Another element to note is that the director of this film is Brett Ratner, you may be familiar with his work in the Epstein Files. 

I noted that there were many interesting things in this film. And D noted that many interesting things does not make an interesting film. There are a few things we learn along the way. For example D leaned over to ask me where Melania was from? I knew the answer was not Queens. I shrugged in the dark. …Slovenia! Our first lady is an immigrant from Slovenia. Also, she uses an Apple computer when Zooming with world leaders like Brigitte Macron, who you may know from her work slapping her husband in the face.  

It feels like the entire first third of the film includes more dress fittings than anything before or after Phantom Thread. And there are more motorcades in an hour and 44 minutes than in all 4 seasons of Succession combined. We learn that Melania’s mother died on January 9th, 2024. Exactly one year later, Melania decides to light a candle for her at a church. If you’re Melania Trump, this requires police cars, the Secret Service, a limo, the closure of Saint Patrick’s Cathedral to the public and a personal blessing from the clergy. As she walks out, a crowd has formed on 5Th Avenue. No one boos, no one cheers, no one takes pictures. Melania is an enigma. And this film doesn’t do much to dispel that hard plastic feeling that you sense from her aura. 

There is one scene where she meets with Aviva Siegel who was held hostage by Hamas for 51 days. At the time of the meeting, her husband Keith is also being held hostage. There was a lot of humanity in that scene. Aviva says, “There is too much hate in the world. Too much hate.” An important message. I don’t doubt Melania believes this as well. However, she is so detached from reality, I’m not sure how much it matters. It’s her film, though, so it’s her message.

I find a movie like this interesting for the Rashomon effect moments. More than one person sees the exact same event but interprets it in totally different ways. Traditionally, the incoming President and first lady spend the night before the inauguration at Blair House. In the morning, they are asked to take a photo with about 20 household staff members on their way to the ceremony. Melania, in her black dress and infamous, D would say Hamburgler style, massively brimmed hat is so incongruous with this group. Dental work is easier to sit through than watching this upstairs downstairs collision. And yet, if you’re a Melania fan, you don’t see the cringe, you simply see your heroine being cool with the staff…or however they might characterize this. Again, it’s a vanity piece, and I’m certain that this scene made the final cut because depicting empathy is the intention.

The film ends with on screen text listing Melania’s accomplishments and, as she would say, initiatives. And these deal with helping foster kids and supporting legislation against using AI deep fakes unethically, as in revenge porn. Who could really argue with this? Melania also touts her 2020 Rose Garden renovation. Of course the President paved over the grassy area she installed with a stone patio in 2025. And let’s not even talk about what he did with her office (hint, it was in the East Wing). But Melania truly doesn’t seem to be phased at all by these changes. In one genuinely brilliant scene, she is on the phone with “Mr. President” and he is asking her if she has seen the final election results. You can tell she is busy with so many other things, isn’t interested and can’t wait to get off the phone. “I’ll watch it later, dear.” It’s great comedy and probably the only scene that organically grows from real life. Melania has other pressing initiatives on her mind. Other state dinners to organize featuring gold leafed eggs stuffed with caviar. Her Style to maintain in exacting detail.

One thing D mentioned in passing which I can’t stop thinking about is how this film would play without the constant voiceover from the first lady. She’s a #1 NYT best selling author, after all, so I’m sure she can’t help herself. But if this film only featured found sounds, diegetic sounds, like a classic cinéma vérité Frederick Wiseman film, it would truly be elevated. Instead, this slice of life has more akin with an IMAX nature documentary than anything a person can really relate to.